“Be kind; everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” — John Watson

I received an e-mail from a client recently and he had the above quote from John Watson in his e-mail signature.  It really hit home for me because I am a divorce lawyer.  In my law practice I am a assisting people as they go through divorces, property disputes, custody fights and other family court matters.  Most of these people are hurting.  They are dealing with something that no one wants to go through and no one ever thinks it will happen to them.  They are hurting and intimidated by the system.   I have found that being kind helps my clients and they really respond well to it.

While you may not be dealing with people in the same situation and circumstances as I am, you are coming into contact with people every day as well.  This day in time, people all over are hurting and dealing with all kinds of problems.  I challenge you to be kind to those you meet.

"If You Chase Two Rabbits, Both Will Escape"  (Author Unknown)

For me, I have a lot of ideas.  I have a lot of dreams.  And, I have a lot of responsibilities.  Many times, the responsibilities require me to hold off on an idea or they make me overly cautious or scared to proceed with a dream.  Even though it may align perfectly with my life vision. 

Here is a peek at the stream of thoughts that are constantly going through my head in some form or another: I like my job, do I like my job, am I a good lawyer, and I a good dad, I like parts of practicing law, can a Christian be a divorce attorney, should I go into full-time ministry of some sort, what kind of business can I open on the side, I need to spend time with my family tonight, I need to work on my business plan, marketing and strategy…  On and on my brain is constantly thinking and working.  I follow nearly 100 blogs and RSS feeds, I listen to about 10 podcasts each week, I read books on business, ministry, parenting, leadership, and personal development all the time.  I can’t turn my brain off.  At least not easily. 

It is in this moment that I realize – somehow it has been brought immediately to my attention – that I need to "be still and know that [He] is God" (Psalm 46:10).  It is in this stillness, this time with God, this focused attention on the Source of the call and vision for my life that I will be directed in the right direction. 

Dilemma enters here.  With all of these new ideas and things that I am interested in pursuing I severely limit what I can do because of the limited time that we all have to live with.  For me, it has always been paralysis by analysis.  I get bogged down in the details because I am always coming up with new details in the plan and not following through with the things I am interested in doing. I guess you could say it is a problem of focus.  Rather than being a directed beam, I have been diffused into a lot of different areas lately.  While that cheap dollar store flashlight works alright it is no steel-cutting laser.

This year I have set several goals – which is not altogether different from other years except that I am doing some things to hold myself accountable.  One of the things I am doing is going on a media diet.  Diet?  I know some people go on media fasts and head for the mountains where there is no cell phone service and no internet.  With a one year old and a busy life I can’t abandon ship for a few days to just get away.  So what I have tried to do is go on a media diet and drastically limit my media intake.

So what have I been doing.  First, I still do my daily Bible study and reading every morning.  During the times I am driving around in my car I do not plug the iPod or iPhone in or listen to the radio.  I have been trying to meditate and let my mind go a little so I can clear out some of the jumble.  I have also heard of people doing a brain dump and writing on a piece of paper everything that comes to their mind as an exercise to get it out of your head and on paper so you don’t feel like you have to remember everything.  I haven’t tried this yet but I am considering it.  So far this has helped me because it is more time for me to get my thoughts together before I get home and things get put into overdrive as we try to go all out when we have family time at night.

I am trying to limit the rss feeds that I am actually reading to only a specific few and I am spending a lot less time “playing” on the internet.

As with any diet you want to do well, I think having an effective media diet  requires you getting a plan together and sticking with it.  Just think, when you want to diet to lose weight you set some goals and some parameters to be able to keep up with what you are doing.  If you don’t then that extra slice of pizza or one more Mountain Dew doesn’t seem like that big of a deal.

I will keep you updated on some of the things I am doing and results I am getting.  What are you doing to increase focus and cut out some of the clutter in your head?

The Story of Life…

On the first day, God created the dog and said: ‘Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.’ The dog said: ‘That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I’ll give you back the other ten?’ So God agreed.

Life has now been explained to you. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I’m doing it as a public service.

One of the things people in our generation are doing differently now, more than ever before, is getting a work model that fits with their life rather than molding their life to fit their work model.  Let’s look at the way things have been done for the last fifty years or so in the U.S.  Companies are open for business Monday through Friday from8 am until 5 pm.  That means if you are an employee of one of those companies you are required/expected to be there during those hours.  You receive a paycheck based on the hours you work and some measure of your value to the company. 

I work in the legal field which is still very "archaic" in how things are done.  Most law firms bill clients by the hour.  So immediately the only way to become more profitable is to bill more hours.  While the hourly rates can reach into the $300-400 dollar range there is never a threshold that says, "okay you are billing enough."  That high hourly rate basically acts as a set of golden handcuffs that keep you at work.  While the hourly rates may change depending on jobs and industries the principle is the same: simply exchanging your time for a paycheck is not how people in our generation want to earn a living…in fact it is simply unacceptable to most of us. 

A new form of income generation is emerging – value billing.  Actually it is, more correctly, re-emerging because this is how things were done prior to the hourly work model.  Value billing is where you are paid based on the value that you provide the client, company or customer, not based on the amount of time that you spend.  So rather than bill by the hour you bill by the project.  This allows you to leverage your time because you know what you are going to earn for the completion of the project if it takes you one hour to complete or if it takes you 40 hours to complete. 

So how does this help the disenfranchised young adult wanting more time for their family?  It totally provides you with time freedom.  The way I like to look at it is like this: it is going to take a lot of your time to create a successful business or to generate your desired income; however, those hours do not have to necessarily be from 8 to 5.  What if you work better at night, or really early in the morning.  What if your son has a baseball tournament or you have other more important family matters than just sitting at a desk?  When you control the work rather than the time for the work you allow yourself to be much more productive and leverage your time and your business.

In the book "The Four Hour Work Week" Timothy Ferriss discusses a principle known as "Parkinson’s Law."  Parkinson’s Law says that work will expand to fill up the time allotted for its completion.  What?  Basically, if you set aside two weeks to complete a project, the project is going to take you two weeks to complete.  If you only set aside three days, you will probably complete the project in three days.  From a job perspective – if you are required to sit at your desk from 8 to 5 your work is going to expand to fill that entire time.  But, if you are free to do what you want after you complete your work, just think how fast you can get everything finished up.  Consider this, do you ever notice how efficient you are the day before you leave for vacation?  You always get more done on that one day than you have in the month before. 

“You and I are essentially infinite choice-makers.  In every momen tof our existence, ware are in that field of all possibilities where we have access to an infinity of choices.”

- Deepak Chopra

How many choices have you made today?  Probably a thousand, and most of them haven’t been done with you consciously thinking about them.  Do you get up when the alarm goes off or do you hit snooze?  Do you brush your teeth before or after you take your shower?  Maybe some of your choices have more of an impact on your day, but nonetheless, you are constantly making choices in your life.

Andy Stanley preached a sermon and wrote about book about the “best question ever.”  He asked, “What is the wise thing for me to do, in light of my past experience, my present circumstances, and my future hopes and dreams?”

Choose to do what is wise.  Choose to do what is better.  When faced with a choice, ask yourself, “Which choice will help me to fulfill God’s call on my life.  Not all choices are bad choices.  Some choices are good choices, but some are better.

Luke 10: 38-42 tells of when Jesus came to visit Mary, Martha and Lazarus at Martha’s house, Martha was busy preparing a meal and making sure the house was in order for their “guest of honor.”  But instead of helping her older sister, Mary sat at Jesus’ feet and listened to Him and learned from Him.  Martha felt like she had to do all of the work she was doing to honor Jesus.  Realize, she made a choice to work rather than sit with Jesus.  Mary made a choice to sit with her Lord.  In Luke 10: 41-42, Jesus told Martha, “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Maybe it’s just me…maybe it’s not.

One of my fraternity advisors and mentors always remembers to send me a note on my birthday and on our anniversary.  Usually it isn’t the only note we get, but it always stands out because I know Jack is busy but he still always remembers and takes that time.  I’m sure he also does that for all of the other APO alum and other special folks in his life.

Today is my birthday and I just have to thank all of my friends who have sent me a card or commented on Facebook (By the way, if you would like to wish me a happy birthday you can by commenting on this post or by heading over to the Connect w/ Tripp page and contacting me through one of those means as well.  Facebook has an awesome feature that lets you know of all of your friend’s upcoming birthdays about a week in advance.  I have gotten lots of comments today from my buddies and it really makes me feel good.  So good that I want to vow to do better to remember my friends’ special events and wish them well when they come around.  I know I have seen those birthdays on Facebook before and basically just ignored them, but from now on I think it’s important to remind people that at least for that moment I am thinking about them.

So, just thought I would remind people how good it feels when people remember your birthday and other special events so you can go about and make your friends’ lives a little happier – at least for a bit.

Are you passionate about what you spend your time doing? Do you really love it? I have spent a lot of time trying to identify my passions, spiritual gifts, and abilities. I refuse to live a life of mediocrity where I am good at what I do but I can’t stand doing it. I think life is too short and your passion is located at the intersection of your passions, spiritual gifts, experiences, and values. That is how God made you unique from any other person on this planet to live out your specific mission.

I recently read a quote that shook my core from Jim Cymbala’s book, Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire that says, “I despair at the thought that my life might pass me by without God moving greatly on my behalf.”

No matter how comfortable my life is, it is worthless if I am just coasting through not doing what I was created for and God will surely not be “moving greatly on my behalf.” So I hope that you can find your passion as well because I think carries over into all parts of life – finances, career, relationships, spirituality, and physical wellbeing.

Since my search for passion is what is really driving me now. I will probably be writing a lot about it. I want my search to be helpful to others in finding their life passions so they can function at 100% effectiveness.

1 Blessed is the man
who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked
or stand in the way of sinners
or sit in the seat of mockers.

2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.

3 He is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither.
Whatever he does prospers.

During that funeral service and for some time thereafter I was really dealing with a lot in my head and my heart.  I was thinking about the man I am today.  I also thought about the legacy that I am leaving.  Will I be a Psalm 1 man?  Do I delight in the Lord and meditate on Him all day?

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him to act.

One of the things that I battle is getting to far out ahead of myself.  My mind is always racing and I get impatient wanting things to happen NOW!  I am sure that everyone deals with this.  There are times in life when you just want God to act and take something difficult away or to give you something you need; but it seems like God is just not in a hurry to do anything.

Everything is done according to God’s plan and we don’t know exactly what that is, but we are comforted in knowing that God has good plans for us:

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Jeremiah 29: 11.